My RA sucks. Well, I suppose everyone's does. But, lately I've been really thinking about what the future is going to hold for me and this disease. It's scary.
I've been really pushing myself at work just to stay afloat. I have FMLA and can miss up to 3 days a week. I really try not to because then I get behind. I'm still expected to complete the workload if I'm gone. And, my boss is really mean to me if I miss time. The other day, I said that I was going to FMLA and only work 6 hours that day. Nobody would talk to me the rest of the day. So, usually, I try to push myself to work 8 hours because I hate that type of treatment.
I'm home today. It's raining outside and I'm under the electric blanket. I don't know what to do next. I can't keep up this pace. I won't survive.
Thursday, November 20, 2014
I Donated My Blood, But I Might Want It Back!
Last week I had the scare of my life. I have never felt death so close. All, because I wanted to help people. Let me back up.
I became a donate life ambassador to help spread the word for people to become organ donors. Saving lives is something that I not only do for a living, but that I strongly believe in. If there is something that you can do that someone will benefit from, DO IT. Unfortunately, with RA, I couldn't be a bone marrow donor, otherwise that would have happened long ago. I just started donated blood this year. I was uneducated and thought I couldn't because of all of my medications.
On Monday, I went to donate blood. We went through the normal screening. Checked my temperature, blood pressure. There is a list of questions that they ask you. Then you lay in a comfy recliner while they take your blood. I was in a hurry to leave because I went after work and it had been a long day.
At home, Mom was making dinner and said she had to run to the store for something. I went upstairs to the bathroom to dye my hair. I had about 1/2 my head in hair dye when I started to feel dizzy, then sweat like a faucet. You know somethings wrong when you don't normally sweat. I yelled down to my sister, who is a teen, responded with "WHAT?" It got worse and I laid myself on the floor. At that point, I felt like I didn't have control of my body. I couldn't yell anymore, couldn't move. I stayed there until it passed.
I went to bed after the little episode because I did not feel well. And, frankly, I was mad that nobody was there for me. About 10pm, I got up to go to the bathroom. I always go to the bathroom upstairs for some reason. When I went to walk down the stairs, it started again. I stopped and sat on the stairs. I yelled for my mom. By that time, I was drenched in sweat. She said I looked like a ghost. Then, my vision was gone. Scariest thing in my life. It was only gone for about a minute, but so much goes through your mind during that time.
We went to the Emergency room, had a IV of fluids. They did a EKG, which was normal. I told them what my bp normally is, which is 90's /60's and they recommended that I not donate. They said that my blood pressure got too low after donating. I'm totally bummed that I can't help people in that way, but I do not want to go through that again.
I became a donate life ambassador to help spread the word for people to become organ donors. Saving lives is something that I not only do for a living, but that I strongly believe in. If there is something that you can do that someone will benefit from, DO IT. Unfortunately, with RA, I couldn't be a bone marrow donor, otherwise that would have happened long ago. I just started donated blood this year. I was uneducated and thought I couldn't because of all of my medications.
On Monday, I went to donate blood. We went through the normal screening. Checked my temperature, blood pressure. There is a list of questions that they ask you. Then you lay in a comfy recliner while they take your blood. I was in a hurry to leave because I went after work and it had been a long day.
At home, Mom was making dinner and said she had to run to the store for something. I went upstairs to the bathroom to dye my hair. I had about 1/2 my head in hair dye when I started to feel dizzy, then sweat like a faucet. You know somethings wrong when you don't normally sweat. I yelled down to my sister, who is a teen, responded with "WHAT?" It got worse and I laid myself on the floor. At that point, I felt like I didn't have control of my body. I couldn't yell anymore, couldn't move. I stayed there until it passed.
I went to bed after the little episode because I did not feel well. And, frankly, I was mad that nobody was there for me. About 10pm, I got up to go to the bathroom. I always go to the bathroom upstairs for some reason. When I went to walk down the stairs, it started again. I stopped and sat on the stairs. I yelled for my mom. By that time, I was drenched in sweat. She said I looked like a ghost. Then, my vision was gone. Scariest thing in my life. It was only gone for about a minute, but so much goes through your mind during that time.
We went to the Emergency room, had a IV of fluids. They did a EKG, which was normal. I told them what my bp normally is, which is 90's /60's and they recommended that I not donate. They said that my blood pressure got too low after donating. I'm totally bummed that I can't help people in that way, but I do not want to go through that again.
Friday, November 7, 2014
Where are the dating sites for RA'ers?
Dating 101: Answer the phone when a boy calls.
A few weeks ago, I mentioned that I gave my number out to a guy I met. He had texted and called. My return texts were short replies. I didn't answer when he called. Really because I was asleep. But, I didn't want to tell him I was sleeping at 7:30 on a Friday night!
I hate going down this road. I hate having to explain my illness to someone, then hear or see their response. Or worse, not hear from them again at all.
He texted yesterday after work asking if we could get together Saturday night. I'm going to try to. I'm so scared though because my body just doesn't allow me to stay up late. And, socializing usually includes drinking. Which I don't do. I guess I could just blame having to drive.
How to other RA'ers date? There should be a online dating site for people with autoimmune diseases! I would so join.
A few weeks ago, I mentioned that I gave my number out to a guy I met. He had texted and called. My return texts were short replies. I didn't answer when he called. Really because I was asleep. But, I didn't want to tell him I was sleeping at 7:30 on a Friday night!
I hate going down this road. I hate having to explain my illness to someone, then hear or see their response. Or worse, not hear from them again at all.
He texted yesterday after work asking if we could get together Saturday night. I'm going to try to. I'm so scared though because my body just doesn't allow me to stay up late. And, socializing usually includes drinking. Which I don't do. I guess I could just blame having to drive.
How to other RA'ers date? There should be a online dating site for people with autoimmune diseases! I would so join.
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